This is Us
I’m hot, so I am not wearing any pants as I sit on my couch- my couch that has been cleaned by my husband three times tonight because my dog cannot control her bladder at the moment. The same dog is on my right, sleeping on top of a rag towel and two puppy pads, well, because of all the pee.
My husband, smashed up against my left leg because there is only one couch cushion that has not been touched by Bella’s pee, is watching the Ken Burns Civil War series on Netflix. History kinda puts me to sleep when I just worked a full day, went to two grocery stores and a pet store, for pee pads of course, and still have three weeks left of school.
My husband is sticky, and every time he takes a sip of his vodka cranberry, his sticky arm hits mine and I have to backspace because he made me mess up, or wipe the sticky off of me.
While you were all at Memorial Day BBQs or pool parties this weekend, I was saying goodbye to someone I love. I was also at the vet, trying to figure out what is wrong with my dog. I cried more than you would ever care to see a grown ass woman cry. Because of the goodbyes. Because something is wrong with my dog. Because I am tired. Because I am scared. Because life. is. hard.
sometimes.
This Is Us
The fan is purring. The windows are open. There is a slight breeze wafting through the screen door. The city air is crisp from the fresh rain. Bella is resting on my right side. She has had a rough weekend, and she is finally finding the sleep she needs.
My husband, snuggling close on my left side, seems to be relaxing for the first time in several days. He has been anxious about our sick dog, and even though she’s not totally better, we’re seeing the hope. He is feeling better, so I am feeling better.
He keeps peeking over at my screen, and I keep pushing him away. “I can’t write with you peering at the words,” I say. “Just wait.” He smiles and looks away. I see his wandering eyes drift over my screen again seconds later. I smile too.
In between the vet visits and farewells, I strolled through Randolf Street Market and found a unique wood painting for the condo that we’re closing on tomorrow. I picked out some new stainless steel appliances too. I was able to dream up our new life in our new Chicago condo, the first place we will ever own, our slice of the American dream, a piece of our history in the making. I dreamed up the new kitchen. The new bathrooms. The parties I would have. The porch sits.The ordinary nights of sitting on a couch with my husband and my dog. Because life. is. beautiful.
always.
This is us.
Newfangled 